Saturday, 26 August 2017
Today’s kilometers: 9
Total kilometers: 1768
Today is a restday in Mora and I forgot to take pictures as I was desperate for a shower and sauna. Sorry for that.
The following post might be hard to read as english isn’t my first language and I never learned the rhetoric of the universities.
So here are some thoughs I had the last days.
There are so many influences and inspirations for this trip. So I just can not compare my decisions and experiences with those of others. This might be the first and worst mistake of it all. As I know I should hike my own hike. Yet I have read about the adventures of Andrew Skurka and Daniel (predictably lost). I have seen the dedication and the work of people like Alex Primitive (musician and tattoo artist), Alex Rose (musician and martial arts fighter), Lisa Winter (musician, designer, builder and robot driver), Miguel Nomad (musician, rise clan) this list is incomplete but I listed the most important people here. Not to mention all the electronic lightcore, melodic hardcore and black metal bands and especially fall of efrafa and lightbearer.
Another big influence for reflections on my doing was KatFood and two books I am reading, Erkenne die Welt by Richard David Precht (a history about western philosophy until the Renaissance) and into the wild by Jon Krakauer (I expect more details then seen in the movie).
So I saw myself hiking through Scandinavia, making mistakes and learning, struggling with patience, being bored and amazed, seeking the comfort of houses and huts when cold and wet. Walking, dealing with injuries, trying all sort of meal variations avoid all to repetitive ones. Complaining, planing, joking, dreaming, reflecting, cursing, laughing and everything in between.
This whole adventure shared a great deal of fun and knowledge with me. Its been way more intense then I’ve ever could imagine. But like always knowledge comes with a burden and I’ve got all this thoughts about mistakes I might make. Simple ones like carrying to much stuff just to comfort me a bit whenever they aren’t critical for this hike. Or spending nights in shelters and huts when I have got a tent with me, just to avoid the cold and rain ridding at the edge of my comfort zone. Even knowing this is all part of the adventure. Is it still raw enough? Is it a true adventure? What is a true adventure?
We took roads when there where trails close. Maybe even trails aren’t the way to go. Maybe one should seek as much wilderness asone possibly can. What’s the goal? Is there a right way to do it? What’s the experience I want? Which way can I learn most?
I taught myself to be careful about purism , years ago. That’s what kept me from reading myself into Lightweight forums as there are to many people arguing about single grams then coming up with individual solutions. Ignoring them and keep reading would have saved me from wasting money and would have spared me some lessons I had to learn the hard way. But reading isn’t the way to have raw experience outdoors either, isn’t it? Is planing legit? If so how much of it? Shouldn’t everyone just jump into the cold water? Or at least shouldn’t I, the one seeking so much without knowing any direction? What brings one closer to memorable experiences, knowledge and worldly wisdom? What builds your character the way you would prefer to be?
Which steps are big enough to become personal milestones, to Form your personality. Which ones are to big? Which ones to small? How can I discover myself to be able to verify my experiences?
Meditation doesn’t work for me at all. I tried that years ago.
Is it about evidence and rationalism? Should I create endless list about weather and temperatures with gear references to be able to clarify my comfort zone? Should one be willing to sacrifice oneself like Chris McCandless? It’s the ultimate and most basic attitude to extract the very essence of experience from such a trip? I do believe in Idealism but I also know of its dangers?
Or is it on the other hand plain and simple? Does thinking ruin it all? Is it the sheer existence and impulse to make one step after another while the surrounding changes? Is it all too individually to ever see a system within it?
I am nowhere near an answer. Whenever I try to answer a single question multiple others come up, tangling me. Ripping apart what I saw fit. You guys realized by know how confuse this issue is for me so I will give it some time. It try to work some things out more precisely.